Eight days of hitchhiking didn’t seem like a hassle as the last eight years of my on and off relapse into drug addiction. “Why did you do it?” Everybody would ask me, I told them a lie that they wanted to hear. Failed relationships, underwhelming career, solitude…They would advise…a lot. I gave them the satisfaction of making them feel better than me, a degenerate drug addict.
I had everything in my life but I lied. I was not ready to tell them that I was just.. numb.
And here I’m now… So this is it. The feeling of being alive. I had to make sure that this is real. The needle scars on my forearms are there. Yup this happiness is as real as pain. I could have stayed at that dark apartment and injected myself again. But things do change don’t they?
I took a long breath of that cold air. The stars they were not the same as in the city. There was a purity in their shine. Distinct and clear like shiny glass beads under a purple river of night. Nana used to tell me the Aurora are the beacon lights for the spirits to guide them into heaven. Oh Nana, how I wish you could see this. Maybe you are out there among the dancing spirits. I’m changed Nana. Wish you could see me now.

Her colours: Snigdha Das


    • Thank you so much ♥ I am really moved that my words could bring tears to someone somewhere in the world. My huge gratitude to you. Please take care of yourself in these troubling times ♥


  1. So reflective of one’s ways. He’s fully in-tuned and well aware of his own addiction, and I won’t say like, but he does seem partly bitter partly accepting of the issue. Yes I have a drug addiction, and I fully accept it, but do i want to change my ways, can I change my ways?


  2. powerful and inspiring post. its hard to get over a addiction Thankyou for sharing this. I admire your guts and your spirit writting this down. Good day


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.